Monday, February 14, 2011

Top 3 Tips for Women Doing The Rules for Online Dating - PART 3 - by Elle Persephone

The below is the final in a series of three guest posts by the deliciously witty Elle Persephone. Take a look back at the previous Top 3 Tips! Click here for Tip 1, and heere for Tip 2.

If you aren't sure who Elle is, check out my introduction post here!

3. You are Too Fucking Available, so WAIT 24 hours…
Point #3 could also be called “Stop Texting” but for those who know me – and know the way I say it the above title packs a better punch. Every loser has said “I hate games” but no man worth his salt has ever said “I hate the chase” and today’s woman is too. fucking. available. First it was pagers, then email, then cell phones, then living together… 

How can he miss you if you never leave? How can he be interested in you, if you already told him everything on your first date? If you’ve mastered SHUTTING UP, and even if you haven’t, it’s now time to SHUT UP on your mobile devices.
Sadly, The Rules for Online Dating are silent on the topic of texting. Therefore, I am implementing a Rule of my very own as inspired by The Rules:

Wait 24 hours to respond when you have received a text. 

I am not kidding. If you he wants to ask you out by text, then he has to do it by Wednesday, otherwise he is SOL because you are BUSY. Besides, guys who get your number and then only text are Duds, or married. My text inbox usually has five messages by Tuesday night, all vying for that coveted Saturday slot. This is in addition to the men who actually call me, and those that arrange meetings on the dating website itself. I do not answer any of them until Wednesday at lunch. 

I write a maximum of three short lines that get right to the point. I never say “No” unless I am certain that there will be a scheduling conflict. Better to have two dates the same night, than none at all! Stop endlessly wasting your time answering silly sext messages that never get to the point.

IN CONCLUSION, interdating (i.e. internet dating) is the future. Posting a "resume" on the internet is how we will meet many people going forward: future friends, future employers, and future spouses. If you know what you are looking for and if you have adequate boundaries firmly in place, it can be fast, easy and fun. It takes me just a few minutes a day to confirm a date for the weekend and each week I meet someone new. As Dr. Phil recommends, "I am in a target rich environment". 

It did not start out easy and I had a lot of bumps on the way but The Rules for Online Dating were a valuable resource and I can not say enough good things about this process. Looking for that BIG love is a noble quest. There is magic every Friday and Saturday night I wanted to be a part of, and now I am. I hope to see you out there.

- Elle Persephone

That's everything from Elle! Remember to take a look at her blog for a series of dates, and what she's learned.

A huge thank you goes to Elle for supplying me with guest posts over the course of this month. Readers, be sure to comment with your thoughts!

Have any experiences with online dating? Email me

This post brought to you by Red Herring, with original content written by Elle Persephone. Photos belong to their credited owners.


  1. Interesting topic!
    Thanks for this post.

  2. This is great! I do agree with you. For me, it's necessary as a woman not to rush things specially when it comes to dating. Dating is fun but you need to be responsible enough. Think your safety first specially in dealing with online dating.


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